SEC Comish Mike Slive was shocked to find out that Lane Kiffin has left Tennessee to go to USC. He had to confront Lane Kiffin and asked him WHY? And Lane Kiffin responded that he is leaving cos:
1) I never learned how to sing Rocky Top
2) Florida is too scared to play an OOC game outside the state of Florida so I dont have to face Urban Meyer at home....phew ...
3) All my losses at USC can be blamed on the sanctions that are coming
4) I made too many friends with coaches in the SEC so it is tough for me to beat em in a game of football ...ahem ....
5) Dad was tired of seeing his defense get gashed and if he were to retire, I'd loose in even worse fashion. Besides after beating Memphis and Kansas, Tenn is now a basketball school
6) Unlike my rivals in the SEC, my rival Notre Dame at USC has a burger eater for a coach (Psst - Weis was fired and Kelly replaced him) ...Unlike my rivals in the SEC, my rival Notre Dame at USC has a coach whose claim to fame is beating Pitt
7) The LA media can actually create enuf buzz with my controversial statements keeping the focus away from the performance of my teams
8) USC song girls are prettier than the recruiting hostesses at Tennessee
9) LA is really a baseball / basketball city - no one's going to call my bluff
10) Maybe I can convince Hollywood how good an actor I am... I already have run 2 teams to the ground and now USC wants me... my acting can't be that bad...
